


the ends of being and ideal grace

by boombashkas



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Fluff, Kissing, M/M, Post-The Heroes of Olympus, Surprise Kissing, jercy - Freeform, that's pretty much it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:20:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23734507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boombashkas/pseuds/boombashkas
Summary: One day, Jason kissed Percy.
Relationships: Jason Grace/Percy Jackson
Comments: 20
Kudos: 388





	the ends of being and ideal grace

**Author's Note:**

> hi. long time, no see.  
> wanted to preface this by saying i'm not really happy with this fic, especially because i feel like i've written this exact thing (including the dialogue) before AND posted it. i tried to go through all my previous stuff to see if that's true but reading my own writing makes me want to. die. so i'm sorry if this is pretty much identical to something else i've written before, i'm dumb like that.  
> i'm sorry i kind of disappeared for a while, but to all the people who suddenly started reading and commenting on my stuff (which i can only attribute to quarantine boredom) thank you so so much and also i'm so so sorry for not posting sooner but your guys' comments basically made me decide to write something again. i havent been feeling 100% (or even 10%) so the first thing i started trying to write was Hella Depressing but i realised no one wanted to read that so instead i made something sweeter and cuter for you. although if i get to finishing that other thing, i will post it too, but it just won't as happy as you guys would probably like :/  
> also, thank you to everyone who's been commenting and being so nice to me, especially the people who come back to read the fics multiple times. i do read each and every comment as soon as i get them, and it makes me feel a lot better. i'm just really bad at replying because i would essentially be saying THANK YOU SO MUCH over and over again and idk i'm worried it'll sound insincere after a while  
> anyway this is getting longer than the actual fic. in summary, please ignore all the parts of the fic that make you think you've read it before, that's all in your head, and thank you for all your kind words. hope you like it <333  
> p.s. idk if i've mentioned this before but english isn't my first language and this is unedited and also i'm pretty sure my brain has significantly atrophied over the past few months so if there are any glaring mistakes (or a LOT of glaring mistakes) please let me know and i'll try to fix them. thanks!

One day, Jason kissed Percy.

The kiss itself would be inconsequential if not for the fact that they weren’t dating. In fact, they hadn’t even _talked_ about dating. They hadn’t even talked about liking each other.

It was a perfectly platonic friendship before Jason leaned in and planted one on Percy.

At first, Percy had thought it had been a mistake. It made sense. It had happened on a quest, right after they had both almost been blown to bits via monster-triggered gas explosion, and they were both weak-kneed and shaky with relief. Post-near death experience ecstasy was something Percy had never been able to explain to someone who had never almost died, but he knew firsthand how it could make you do crazy things. Things you meant to do, and also things you didn’t mean to do. 

He was pretty sure the kiss fell in the second category, on account of how Jason had flown off and disappeared into the horizon straight after.

Percy had agonized over it for a long time. He hadn’t seen Jason for three days, during which he went through several options for what his next step should be: He could ask a friend for advice, of which only two people – Annabeth or Nico – seemed appropriate, except he and Annabeth were still in that weird post-breakup awkward stage, and he knew the first thing Nico would do was go running to Jason with questions. He could just ignore it, which was going well for him so far. Or he could bring it up with Jason directly – the thought of which made his stomach twist.

But, as it turned out, all that worrying was for nothing. The next time he saw Jason, he acted like nothing had happened. In fact, he was being so normal, so usually his dry-wit earthshaking-laugh twinkling-eyes Jason Grace self, Percy almost fooled himself into believing nothing _had_ happened.

And, to be fair, that wasn’t as unlikely as it sounded. It was entirely possible Percy had hallucinated the whole thing during his survivor’s euphoria. Stranger things had happened, after all. Although it didn’t explain why Percy would hallucinate something so completely out of left field.

So Percy had let his guard down. And then there had been the night out by the lake.

Percy had been lying down at the end of the pier, stargazing. One of his arms had been hanging down near the water, and he was drawing a thin stream up his arm, over his veins, just to feel the coolness of it on his skin.

Jason had wordlessly walked over and sat down beside him. Percy hadn’t said anything either; he’d just sat up, pulled some more water up from the lake and used it to form what he thought was a pretty good imitation of thundercloud with a bolt of lightning erupting down from it.

He’d grinned at Jason, who had poked a finger at the lightning bolt, flicking droplets of water off its end and blunting its tip. Jason had smiled back, and then he’d shuffled forward and kissed Percy.

Percy’s miniature thundercloud had dissolved into a wet puddle on his jeans, but he hadn’t minded. In fact, he didn’t remember thinking very much at all. He wasn’t even sure if he’d kissed Jason back.

He just knew that it had ended too quickly for Percy to gather up the jumbled contents of his mind, and by the time Percy had opened his eyes, Jason was already leaving. And Percy hadn’t been able to find his voice long enough to shout “What’d you do that for?!”

Which was exactly what he was thinking, not even a week later, during a game of Capture the Flag, when, in front of everyone, Jason yanked Percy forward by his breastplate, kissed him soundly, and snatched the flag right out of his hand.

Percy, dumfounded, watched Jason sprint away and disappear into the woods, flag aloft, not even looking back.

“Did you…” he turned, wide-eyed, to his teammates, “Did you see that?”

“Percy, you _idiot_!” Piper shouted from two feet away as she fought off two campers at once. “Are you _crazy_?”

“But did you see? He _kissed_ me!”

“Congratulations!” one of his teammates shouted right in his face. “You just lost us the game!”

“But didn’t you see –“ Percy sputtered, “He – and I – it’s _Jason_!”

Annabeth was letting out her anger on a poor son of Hephaestus who had tried to sneak up on her. “Percy Jackson, I’m going to _murder_ you,” she hissed, before knocking the son of Hephaestus out cold.

Of course, the other team won. Percy could feel all his teammates glaring holes in his head as they watched Chiron announce the winners, which was bad enough without his face so hot and his lips feeling like they were buzzing.

Jason didn’t even look fazed. Percy couldn’t believe the nerve.

“But didn’t you _see_?” he hissed at Piper as they lined up in front of the sacrificial fire during dinnertime. “He _kissed_ me.”

“Okay, we get it,” Piper said, pushing his face back with one hand. “Say it, don’t spray it, dude.”

“ _Jason Grace_ kissed _me_ ,” Percy repeated. “In front of _everyone_! Why isn’t this a huge thing?”

Piper gave him a look. “Whatever weird stuff you and Jason need to figure out is between the two of you,” she said as she tossed a baked potato into the fire. “It’s none of our business. You know what _is_ our business, though?” She slapped a hand on his shoulder. “You dropping the ball right when we needed you.”

“Big-time,” Annabeth said right behind him.

“So much for the great Percy Jackson,” Piper said in a mock-sigh.

“You guys aren’t going to act like what happened was completely normal, are you?” Percy asked, but Piper was already walking back to her table. He turned to Annabeth. “Like it doesn’t even _matter_?”

Immediately, he was struck by how weird it was to talk about this with his ex-girlfriend, but Annabeth didn’t bat an eyelash. “Of course it matters,” she said. “But is it _normal_?” She scraped some food off her plate into the fire, which blazed bright green. “I guess it’s as normal as you guys doing your regularly-scheduled Competitive Flirting program every time you see each other.”

That’s how she said it: Competitive Flirting. Like it was capitalized. “What are you talking about,” Percy said, dread rising in his chest.

“Oh, Percy,” Annabeth sighed. For a second, he thought she was reaching for him, then she picked a chicken leg off his plate and pitched it into the fire. “Talk to Jason about it. I’m sure it’ll clear things up.”

Percy’s heart was in his throat. He could hear Jason laughing off to his left. “What if I don’t want it to?”

“Then don’t talk about it,” Annabeth shrugged. “Just kiss _him_ in the middle of the game next time. It looks like it’s a great strategy so far.”

She walked away, smile on her face, while Percy stood there with his cheeks burning almost as hot as the fire.

As he lay in bed that night, staring up at his ceiling, he made his decision. Next time Jason Grace thought he could attack Percy like that, he was going to confront him. And he was going to be ruthless about it.

No mercy.

~*~

So the next time it happened, Percy was prepared for it. At least somewhat.

He was packing up the wooden swords and shields after a swordfighting lesson with the younger campers when Jason appeared out of nowhere, walking up to Percy with an easy smile on his face, shoulders relaxed, looking without a care in the world. He was wearing a navy blue hoodie on top of his orange tee and had the sleeves up, the cotton straining against golden skin, baring his forearms and the striking blackness of his Camp Jupiter tattoo. Percy didn’t know who he was showing off for.

Percy wouldn’t usually be so on edge when talking to Jason. The guy had a natural ability to make Percy let his guard down, and it wasn’t exaggerating to say Percy had more fun with him than pretty much anyone in the entire camp. But Percy had resolved to be as firm and immovable as a rock. If he was kissed, he would have questions about it.

And if he wasn’t kissed…

Well, maybe he shouldn’t be _quite_ so firm and immovable. 

“Nice turn on the upswing there,” Jason said, grinning, as he watched Percy haul up the swords. “Don’t know what the point of teaching that to a bunch of twelve-year-olds is, though. It’s not like they’re going to be able to use it in battle.”

“You never know,” Percy said, keeping his face impassive. “I barely got any lessons before they sent me out to find that stupid lightning bolt when I was their age, and every bit of training helped me to not, you know, die.” Jason laughed, almost breaking Percy’s grim-faced mask. “None of them understood how to do that move, obviously, but it could still help them someday.”

“True,” Jason said, jogging over to help Percy carry the supplies back to the armory. “Maybe I should upgrade my lessons too, then.” He nudged Percy with his shoulder. “Wouldn’t want any of the kids thinking you know your stuff better than I do.”

Percy raised his eyebrows at him. “Why not? They’d be right.”

Jason snorted. “Sure. Hey, remember that time you triggered the apocalypse by having a nosebleed?”

Percy kicked at him. “Remember the time you kept getting knocked out right before a huge battle? Oh, that’s right, you can’t.”

Jason gasped, and then it turned into a competition of who could kick or elbow the other the most without dropping any of the weapons they were carrying. Finally, Percy hip-checked Jason with all his might, and a piece of armor fell out from the crook of Jason’s elbow.

“Aha!” Percy crowed in delight, almost dropping a wooden sword in his excitement. “I win!”

“That isn’t the game!” Jason protested, laughing. He jerked his foot towards the dropped armor, making it fly back into his arms. 

“Oh, yeah?” Percy raised an eyebrow, smug. “Then what is it?”

Jason turned to Percy, and there was a suspicious grin on his face. “Last one to the armory loses,” he said, lightning-fast, then took off running.

Percy ran after him, shouting about longer legs and cheating and cold-blooded murder. When he crossed the threshold of the armory, Jason was already there, calmly cataloguing the supplies back on their shelves.

“Dear Jupiter, Percy, where _were_ you?” he asked sternly, hands on his hips. “I’ve been waiting all _day_.”

So, of course, Percy tackled him. 

This was usually how he opted to settle their bickering, especially when he knew he was going to lose. In the beginning, it had been honest-to-goodness wrestling, but now it was largely a tickle fight, with a lot of rolling around and trying to pin each other down.

Jason was strong, stronger than Percy, and he had long broad pillar-like fingers that easily grabbed and pulled and snuck their way into the curve of Percy’s neck. His legs were powerful too, his thigh muscles straining against his jeans whenever he sat down. Now they pressed at Percy’s legs, trying to pin him.

He always pinned Percy, never the other way around. Percy didn’t know if that was because Jason was just plain beefier than Percy was, or because Percy gave in too easily.

Percy was too out of breath from laughing, his fingers tangling up in the unnecessarily long strings of Jason’s hoodie, and then the next thing he knew, he was flat on his back in the middle of the armory floor, warm broad palms pushing down on his biceps, legs immobile under Jason’s. 

Jason was grinning down at him, cheeks flushed, panting, sweat beading at his forehead, golden hair hanging down into his eyes. He had let it grow out longer than Percy had ever seen it and now it caught on his eyelashes when he blinked.

The laughter died out in Percy’s throat. His gaze slipped to Jason’s smiling mouth, and then it was on him.

It was like all the other times Jason had kissed him. Softer than he’d expected. Warm. Absolutely amazing. And so, so confusing.

When they finally pulled apart – slow, like a pair of magnets unwilling to part – Percy blinked up at him, mouth open.

Then he shoved Jason off.

“What,” he said, sitting up, “are you _doing_?”

Jason stared at Percy, or more specifically, at Percy’s lips. The pink of his cheeks was slowly blooming into a true red. “Um,” he said, then said nothing else.

Percy waved his hands impatiently in a _‘Go on’_ gesture. He was hot and sweating like someone had just roasted him alive, but he wasn’t going to let his nerves get the better of him. He was getting answers.

Jason was still, like an animal that had been spooked. “I,” he said, “kissed you?”

Percy’s heart jumped at the words. “Yes, you did,” he said, folding his arms. “Do you want to explain _why_?”

Jason’s eyebrows shot up in apparent surprise “ _Why_?”

“Why?” Percy confirmed.

Jason’s mouth opened and closed. “Because –“ he waved his hands between the two of them, “Because that’s what we’ve been doing. Right?”

“That’s what _you’ve_ been doing,” Percy corrected, “to _me_.”

Jason was starting to go a little pale. “And… and you didn’t like it?”

Percy felt even hotter, if that was possible. “That’s not the point. The point is I didn’t ask you to kiss me.”

“Yeah, I know, I –” Jason shook his head in a short stuttering burst. “Wait.” He stood up, carefully, as if he wasn’t sure his legs would work. “Are you trying to tell me…“

Percy got up and folded his arms.

Jason’s eyes were travelling his face, as if searching for some sort of explanation, but it looked like he’d already realized something. “Are you telling me,” he said, swallowing hard, “that all this time I’ve – that we’ve –“

Percy’s arms fell. He didn’t like the look on Jason’s face, like he’d just been sucker-punched.

Jason took a deep breath. “Are you telling me that you didn’t want –“ he shook his head. “But you always kissed me back.”

Percy blinked. “I did?”

“Yeah.” He let out a short laugh and looked away. “The first time, when I tried to pull away, you grabbed my arm so hard you bruised me. And the second time wasn’t even the second time – it was the third, and fourth and fifth, because you wouldn’t let me go…” He looked back at Percy, hesitant. “You really didn’t want me to…?”

Percy opened his mouth but nothing came out. What was he supposed to say? That he didn’t remember the kisses happening like that? 

Or that he didn’t _want_ to remember, in case Jason was right?

He hesitated for a moment too long. Jason’s face closed off quicker than Percy had ever seen it – eyes shuttering, frown smoothing.

“Wait,” Percy said, “Jason –“

“I think I should go,” Jason said, keeping his eyes down. “See you later, Percy.”

And he turned and walked out of the armory so fast, Percy didn’t think he would have been faster flying.

~*~

Percy didn’t know what he wanted.

That’s what it came down to, in the end. He’d hurt Jason, and for what? 

So he could say he didn’t like Jason Grace?

But he really _didn’t_ like him. 

But then why had his chest been hurting for the past week? Why did his limbs feel so heavy? Why did he want to throw himself off a cliff every time he remembered the wounded look on Jason’s face?

It took only a few days of staring at the mirror – or more specifically, at his own lips, still tingling with the ghost of Jason’s – to realize he didn’t mind it when Jason kissed him. 

He didn’t remember throwing himself at Jason the way Jason had described, but he thought he could believe it. He remembered grabbing onto Jason whenever they kissed, but he’d never thought too much about it, believing that was just him trying to balance himself after being thrown off-kilter by the pressure of Jason’s lips.

Even the fact that he had believed that for a second – “Balance myself, who am I kidding,” he mumbled into his pillow – made him want to die out of embarrassment. He’d really made a complete fool out of himself.

He had wanted Jason to kiss him. He liked it when Jason did. And the realization that Jason wanted to do it too, that Jason initiated it – Jason Grace, who had once confided in Percy that he thought he was too shy to have ever made any friends if not for people approaching him because he was the son of Jupiter, who had told Percy he thought making the first move was way too risky and he would never do it no matter how much he liked someone, who sent Percy’s mom flowers on Mother’s Day, who let the youngest most irritating campers chatter his ear off long after they had annoyed the patience out of everyone else, who always told Percy in private when he thought Percy was being too rude or too harsh or just plain wrong, but defended him in front of other people when they called Percy out for the exact same thing – 

It made Percy’s heart feel like it was too big for his chest.

So did that mean he liked Jason?

“Yes,” he told his reflection on the seventh day of wallowing in his angst. “And it also means you’re a coward.”

And so, on the eighth day after he accidentally rejected the guy he liked, he walked out of his cabin and straight to Jason’s, raised his knuckles to the door, and stopped. 

Usually, he always knocked a specific jingle on Jason’s door, and Jason did the same for him, so they would both instantly know the other was at the door. It was nice when he was lying in bed bored, to hear that knock on his door and know the rest of the day was going to be fun. But should he do it right now?

He took a deep breath and knocked the jingle.

He hadn’t realized he’d been hearing movement from inside until it stopped. Two heartbeats later, Jason opened the door.

He was wearing a baby blue T-shirt and jeans, his hair slightly mussed like he’d just rolled out of bed. He looked like he always did, the same old Jason. So why was Percy suddenly feeling lightheaded?

“Um,” Percy said eloquently, “Hey.”

Jason’s eyes travelled his face. “Hi.” He fiddled with the doorknob, the gesture so obviously nervous it calmed Percy.

“Can I come in?” Percy asked.

There was a pause where he was sure Jason was going to shut the door in his face. Then Jason stepped aside.

Percy walked in, trying not to look at the offensively eye-catching statue of Zeus in the centre of the cabin.

The room itself was like it always was: immaculately clean. The only sign of life was the alcove in the far back of the cabin, where Jason had set up his bed. It was way too small for Jason to be able to sleep comfortably, and Percy always told him he would end up having back problems for life if he didn’t shift to a real bed soon. But he knew Jason would rather sleep on the floor than in any of the bunks that were directly in statue-Zeus’s line of sight.

If only Percy could offer Jason a bed in Cabin Three. But then, rules were rules.

“You wanna sit?” Jason asked, gesturing to the nearest bed.

Percy glanced at the bed, then at the statue. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

Jason laughed a little, and an imperceptible bit of tension left his body. “If I can sleep every night with him in the room, I can handle him standing over me for a few minutes.” He took a seat on the bed and looked up at Percy. “So what’s up?”

His eyes kept darting from Percy’s face to his chest, then away, then back. When Percy sat down next to him, he jumped a little.

It made Percy’s heart ache. He wanted Jason to stop looking like that, so he wasted no time deliberating what to say.

“I’m sorry.”

Jason turned to him, looking horrified. “Don’t be sorry!” he cried. “ _I’m_ the one who should be sorry. Gods, Percy, I can’t believe I really – I should have _asked_ before I –“ he faltered and shook his head, letting out great big sigh. “I shouldn’t have made assumptions. I’m the one who’s sorry.”

“You weren’t making any assumptions,” Percy said in a rush. “I kissed you back.”

Jason stopped shaking his head. His face slackened a little. “You remember?” he asked, swallowing hard.

Percy watched his throat work, and all at once, he realized he _wanted_. 

He inched forward on the bed. Jason watched his progress.

“I’m sorry I hurt you,” Percy said quietly. 

Jason’s eyes softened. “That’s okay,” he said with a small smile, turning away. “No harm done.”

“But that’s the thing.” Percy took a deep breath to calm his thundering heart. “I think I hurt me too.”

Jason froze, his body a tight line of tension. 

“And if it’s okay with you…” Percy paused, then slowly, so as to not scare him, pushed his hand toward Jason’s, lying on the bedcover.

Jason didn’t bring his hand closer, but he didn’t move it away either. He turned his head and watched intently, brow furrowed, as Percy hooked their pinkies together.

“If it’s okay with you,” Percy continued, “do you think you could give me another chance?”

Slowly, as if through syrup, Jason raised his eyes. For a few long torturous seconds, he just looked at Percy, and Percy’s pulse thumped so hard he was sure Jason could feel it in his pinkie. Then a sweet, almost bashful smile blossomed on his lips.

Percy was helpless to do anything but smile back. So he did – hugely, dopily, trying to let out even a fraction of the wild giddiness taking over him.

Jason leaned in and, for a heart-stopping moment, Percy thought they were actually going to kiss again, but then Jason tilted down his chin and whispered, “The only problem is,” his eyes flicked upwards, “Jupiter’s watching us.”

A laugh erupted out of Percy. Jason looked at him like it was the most amazing sound he had ever heard.

Percy thought he’d do anything to have Jason keep looking at him like that.

“What, you’re not into that?” Percy grinned. “How very un-Ancient Greek of you.”

Jason wrinkled his nose, but his smile didn’t fade. “Only you could ruin the moment by saying something gross like that, and still make me want to kiss you.”

He said it so off-handedly, like it was normal for them to talk about kissing each other. But now, Percy realized with delight, it _would_ be normal. 

They were going to kiss each other until it became routine, and Percy couldn’t wait. 

“Okay, then, Jason Grace,” he said, getting up and hauling Jason after him. He followed Percy without question, smiling and tightening his grip on his hand. “Time for a detour to Cabin Three. Destination: my bunk.” Percy grinned. “I’m going to show you what a _real_ kiss looks like.”

**Author's Note:**

> main tumblr @boombashkas  
> fic tumblr @riflesspiral


End file.
